Thursday, August 13, 2009

Another Heartbreak For US Soccer

American soccer fan's latest hope to popularize "futbol" in this country fell flat, again. Yesterday the United States lost a 2-1 nail biter to Mexico. Today there are roughly 30 people in the U.S. crushed.

This was the time. The United States were gonna win in Mexico and the whole country would be soccer crazy.

Not gonna happen.

My favorite part is how everyone blamed the loss on the altitude. Huh? You mean because the team was caught off guard. No, people were saying that would be an issue going in. Well how about this. There's this place, in the United States, called Colorado. The NFL Denver Broncos used to play their games in Mile High Stadium.

If this soccer game was so dam important and meant everything to the country, why wouldn't the US soccer team prepare for such a meaningful event in, lets say, Denver?

When the World Cup was played on American soil in 1994, soccer was going to be huge.

That didn't last.

And Brandi Chastain tearing her shirt off, revealing basically a smaller shirt, for sure brought soccer to the United States.

Not even a blonde in a sports bra could popularize the sport. The LPGA is far more exciting. The L-P-G-A! for Christ sake!

We brought David Beckham over from across the pond and that was for sure going to make soccer America's past time. Instead it has become an ongoing punchline.

I can't believe I'm actually writing about soccer!

I loved all the facebook posts from my toolass friends-"USA! USA!", "I wish I was in Azteca!", "I love soccer!"


I get rallying behind your country. I love seeing the United States beat another country in any sport. It just seems like every other year something big is about to happen with soccer and some people jump on the bandwagon only to fall off a day later.

Let's face it. Soccer is something the United States has never, and will never be good at. Why? Because the sport is boring. It has no historical significance to this country. 99.9% of the country doesn't care about it. There are too many other exciting, more marketable sports to follow. There's not room for another.

Yeah when the US beat Russia in hockey it was labeled the "Miracle On Ice." But that victory meant so much more than just one hockey team beating another. Hockey might be less popular today than it was back in 1980.

Well, the only reason I am mentioning soccer is so I can plug a "Simpson's" video. No one can sum up America's attitude on soccer better than Matt Groening and "The Simpson's."

Keep beating that dead horse soccer fan.

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